Reading Lists, Crime Clean-Up and Writing

Watching: Houdini & Doyle

Drinking: Chocolate Flavored Coffee

Feeling: Untethered

Losing things is so difficult to deal with. I'm trying to let go of the things I've collected and with it, the strange binding ropes that keep me on a muddle-minded path. I don't want those holds, but who realized it would come from a few childish items I've kept from childhood. 

This little dancing ballerina.... I had it forever, but where did it come from? What was her story? 

My story? I was a really sick child so I don't remember much outside of hospitals. 

I do remember my room. My mom has been such a good "keeper" and has kept everything from my youth. But I wonder if it keeps me tied to that sick child? And would letting it go free me or will my identity still be a shadow of my youth? Will all my decisions be safe because I was hardly safe from an ill fate if science hadn't stepped in with such new medications....

Instagram is frustrating. It keeps suggesting books that I know I need to experience for myself. Books are so much cheaper than the decadent chocolates I long to buy. However, I now have over 300 books on my TBR list. Ann told me to put these books on while I clean. I would rather sit and listen to the books in stillness. 

I just finished C.S. Lewis book on grief. I can see why he's wildly read. He has a way with expressing thought/feeling in such a beautiful way that actually touched my mind and heart.

Someone mentioned that cleaning can be fun if you pretend you are cleaning up a crime scene. I thought that was hilarious, but it's actually helped me find spots that I never would have noticed before. Our place is starting to look like the day we moved in. There isn't much I can do with the white carpet though. We have rugs, but after 5 years, there are spots.

There is a horror museum that will open in August out here in California and I think it's full of iconic horror movies. I want to go so badly so I'm going to have to see what our schedule looks like. I told Sue about it, but Sue said "heck no" ..... okay, maybe "heck" wasn't the word she used. She really hates horror and I learned that the hard way, with a very strong punch to my arm. I'm surprised she even went to a haunted corn maze with us. 

Writing Update:

D.P. I have decided what my two alphas look like. There is so much heat between the two of them and its the wrong energy. I wanted tension, but this might be too much tension. I feel exhausted by it. Kissing and making up won't work. I need to keep writing until I can figure this out.

K.B.C. I finally got my demon clean and boy is he a cutie.... I think. 😂 My anti-hero thinks so too. I finally at Chapter 5 finally got a few hints on my anti-hero's background. I think editing will make everything so much cleaner. I'm really trying not to judge here. I have this story in one point of view, but I'm thinking I should make it two? Not sure yet, but I'm on Chapter 5 of this first draft. 


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